Trimmed

8 responses to “Trimmed”

• Alice
  January 7th, 2013 at 10:39 am

  Sometimes I wonder if you’re a fly on my wall? Had a conversation about the “suck it up” mentality with boys this week.

  Reply
  • Steve Hauptman
    January 7th, 2013 at 1:36 pm

    And what position did you take? Are you pro-suckitup, or anti-suckitup?

    Reply
    • alice
      January 7th, 2013 at 1:44 pm

      Anti

      Reply
      • Steve Hauptman
        January 7th, 2013 at 2:11 pm

        Good 4 you. 🙂

        Reply
• Clare Flourish
  January 8th, 2013 at 4:45 am

  Do remember, too, that “it is not feminine to get angry”. I had the big boys don’t cry message- its complicated- and when I found my feelings, I found they were rage and terror.

  Reply
  • Steve Hauptman
    January 8th, 2013 at 8:05 am

    Yes. Emotional trimming is not gender-specific. Since all get socialized, we all get trimmed.

    Reply
• SheLongedForStarsInHerHeart
  January 14th, 2013 at 9:10 am

  Your comment (Since all get socialized, we all get trimmed) is making me wonder if there could ever be societies where less trimming happens… Or are we bound to end up trimming in one way or another (if it is not crying or anger, it could be something else) because that is how societies are built /need to be built?

  Reply
  • Steve Hauptman
    January 14th, 2013 at 9:20 am

    I’d like to think so. On one level, “less trimming” is what some people call social justice.

    But on a deeper level I assume there will always be tension between the needs of individuals and the needs of the tribe, and that — given the need of individuals to belong to something larger than themselves — the
    needs of the tribe will always be more powerful.

    In other words, we’ll always have to submit to trimming in exchange for membership.

    Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.