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May 28th, 2026 at 2:52 pm
word substitute for control is “influence”. Not as vulgar or traumatic
May 28th, 2026 at 3:32 pm
Well, I’m not sure I want a softer word to describe what I’m writing about. If “control” strikes you as hard-edged, that’s because control itself has hard edges. In fact, controlling might arguably be described as violent — or to use your words, vulgar (coarse, crude, obscene) and traumatic (causing injury or distress) — at least when it is describing interpersonal behavior. If I control someone with whom I’m in relationship I am essentially violating their integrity, boundaries and freedom of choice. The word “influence” does not quite capture that severity.
May 28th, 2026 at 5:17 pm
You have written persuasively and with great clarity vis-a-vis your position, why the word “control” is appropriate in all relevant circumstances. I will come back to you in due course once I have had the opportunity to come up with a different angle on how to stick handle around the problems faced by humans when they assert excessive control over one another.