*

Childhood serves

a purpose.

It isn’t something to

“get through” or speed up.

It’s there to protect

developing minds.

To nurture young souls.

So let’s give our kids

the space to be unbusy.

Let’s unschedule.

Let’s “miss out.”

Let’s hold the space

for childhood.

Because childhood

isn’t a dress rehearsal

for adulthood.

~ Tracy Gilbert

*

With every act

of self-care

your authentic self

gets stronger,

and the critical,

fearful mind

gets weaker.

Every act

of self-care

is a powerful

declaration:

I am on my side,

I am on my side,

each day I am

more and more

on my own side.

~ Susan Weiss Berry

*

x

If there is no solution

to the problem, then

don’t waste time

worrying about it.

If there is a solution

to the problem, then

don’t waste time

worrying about it.

~ Dalai Lama 

x

*

The typical American

has few dark secrets

which he must guard

at his peril. 

Most of his supposed

aberrations are facets

of the self which are

common, perhaps

even universal. 

Other people are

struggling to disguise

precisely the same

thoughts or

potentialities.

~ Snell & Gail Putney, The Adjusted American (1964)

*

 *

The beginning of love

is the will to let those

we love be perfectly

themselves, and not

to twist them to fit

our own image.

Otherwise we love

only the reflection

of ourselves

we find in them.

~ Thomas Merton

*

x

x

x

Eagles build their nests high

on rocky cliffs or in tall trees. 

This makes it hard for them

to teach their chicks to fly. 

So the eagle pushes the baby

out of the nest, and as it flaps

and squawks and falls to earth,

the adult catches it and kind

of swats it back up in the air

so it can try again to fly on

its own. 

Up and down, being caught

and letting go, the young

eagles eventually learn

to fly….

So it is with you and

your children. 

You must teach them

the right way to live, but

you must also let them

fly by themselves, and

learn from the bumpy

ride how to deal with

the scary freedoms

of life. 

When they’re fully

“fledged,” you must

say with sadness —

and hopefully also

with pride — that

they’re living on

their own, beyond

your control or

command. 

~ Marc Gellman and Tom Hartman, “The God Squad,” Newsday 1/17/04.

x

The only way

to get what

you really

want is

to know

what you

really want.

And the only

way to know

what you

really want

is to know

yourself.

And the only

way to know

yourself is to

be yourself.

And the only

way to be

yourself is

to listen to

your heart.

~ Mike Dooley

Pain is a relatively

objective, physical

phenomenon;

suffering is our

psychological

resistance to

what happens.

Events may create

physical pain,

but they do not

in themselves

create suffering.

Resistance creates

suffering.

Stress happens

when your mind

resists what is….

The only problem

in your life is your

mind’s resistance

to life as it unfolds. 

~ Dan Millman

x

x

Once you lose yourself,

you have two choices:

find the person

you used to be,

or lose that

person completely.

~ H.G. Wells

x

x

(Continued from part 1.)

The inner-directed person

acts and does things for

himself.

His primary identification

is with himself as a person,

and his activities are an

expression of who he is.

He finds his fulfillment in

his response to the world

rather than in the world’s

response to him….

Another important difference

between these two personality

types lies in the way they

recognize their problems

and define their desires.

The inner-directed person

knows what he wants and

expresses it concretely.

He may say, for example,

“I feel I’m pushing myself

too hard and need to let

down,” or he may observe,

“My body is too tight and

my breathing too shallow.

I need to open up.”

He speaks personally

from a position of

self-awareness.

The outer-directed person

cannot do this; his demands

are general and couched in

broad terms like “I want love”

or “I want to be happy.”

This style of speaking denotes

a lack of self-awareness

and strong feeling….

x

~ Alexander Lowen, Depression and the Body (1972)

x

From the viewpoint of a tendency

to depression, people can be divided

into two categories, the outer- and

the inner-directed….

The outer-directed person puts

what faith he has in other people

and so risks constant

disappointment.

He is forever seeking something

outside himself to believe in:

a person, a system, a belief,

a cause, or an activity….

Offhand this might seem a positive

approach; on the surface it appears

he is involved and doing things.

But the doing is for others, and

it is done with the unconscious

expectation that the others will

recognize his worth and respond

with love, acceptance, and support.

(Continued tomorrow.)

xx

When you blame and

criticize others, you

are avoiding some

truth about yourself.

~ Deepak Chopra

xx

xx

xx

Never forget the nine most

important words of any family:

I love you.

You are beautiful.

Please forgive me.

~ H. Jackson Brown Jr.

x

x

xx